How Mormon is Mitt Romney?

I don't know much about the 2012 presidential race and I know even less about Mitt Romney. But having a Mormon in the white house could be interesting. I ran across this article and highlighted my favorites. And you really probably have to be Mormon to find some of these funny. (All are from independent people on twitter, apparently. And I think it was instigated by some leader saying he didn't think Romney was Mormon enough. Interesting.)

Mitt is so Mormon he’ll make the income tax a flat 10% and collect fast offerings to fund Medicaid.

Mitt is so Mormon he’ll ask the Senate to “sustain” his appointees by manifesting with an upraised hand.

Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign “oppo” team has done all the other candidates’ genealogy.

Mitt is so Mormon he’ll choke up and weep during his inaugural address. And then say, “I told myself I wasn’t going to cry.”

Mitt is so Mormon, he will actually hang the Constitution up by a thread, just so he can save it.

Mitt is so Mormon he’ll start the State of the Union with the words: “I wasn’t going to get up, but the Spirit just carried me up here.”

Mitt is so Mormon his campaign biography begins, “I, Willard, having been born of goodly parents.”

Mitt is so Mormon, he will ask members of Congress to go home and pray about his economic plan.

Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Elders Quorum to move him into the White House.

Mitt is so Mormon, he asks donors to stack chairs after fundraising dinners.

Mitt is so Mormon that his campaign slogan is “What do you know about Mitt Romney? Would you like to know more?”

Mitt is so Mormon he’d do an ad for the LDS Church: “I’m a husband, father, and leader of the free world. And I’m a Mormon.”

Mitt is so Mormon he isn’t as concerned about getting American youth jobs as he is about getting them married.

Mitt is so Mormon he’ll assign a friend to every new member of Congress.

Mitt is so Mormon that he’ll change the name of “Cabinet Meeting” to “Correlation Meeting.”

Mitt is so Mormon that if he got elected all of the White House Pyrex 9x13 pans would have a piece of masking tape on them with his name written in Sharpie.

Mitt is so Mormon that late last night he snuck out to put 5000 plastic forks in the lawn of Jon Huntsman. And after that, he heart attacked Rick Perry.

Mitt is so Mormon he’d ask the Chief Justice to use a quad at his inauguration.

Mitt is so Mormon, he will add the phrases “every fiber of my being” and “beyond a shadow of a doubt” to the presidential oath of office.